Rosalina

Rosalina Millon Etrata was born on June 7,1954 in Urdaneta, Pangasinan, Philippines. She had a twin sister, Rosalinda Millon Etrata, and an elder sister, Maria Lolita Millon Etrata (born February 3, 1946) Lina had 3 brothers: Orlando Millon Etrata, Eduardo Millon Etrata, and Fernando Millon Etrata. Maria was the eldest, Fernando the youngest.

Lina's mother was Venancia Millon (one of 6 children) and her father was Alfredo Etrata (the eldest of 3 children - all boys) Her paternal grandfather was Mauricio Etrata and her paternal grandmother was Sianang. Her maternal grandfather was Catalino Millon, and her maternal grandmother was Apolonia.

As Lina grew up, she became very interested in manicure and pedicure, as well as cooking. I can testify to her skills in each because she kept my finger and toenails in excellent condition. Her hairdressing skills were equally as good when my hair needed cutting, and she made sure that my eyebrows and moustache were also in order. In all these matters, Lina was a perfectionist.

As to her cooking, I can only say "wow". Even her sandwich making was very special with the same attention to detail as were the meals. Her favourite food was Tilapia fish, closely followed by Filipino vegetables. She often went to Billingsgate Market on Saturdays at 5 am to buy fish. Lina's favourite drink was Tea, and in particular, Tetley Tea Bags.

Rosalina Roughan passed away from Cancer at 02.15 on March 14, 2024 at Newham University Hospital. She had been admitted on November 19, 2023, and moved between Newham Hospital and The Royal London Hospital in Whitechapel during this 16 week period. Since Dec 26, she has not been in an open ward due to a super bug. Isolation is never easy but Lina faced this as best she could. Her bravery and resilience throughout has been remarkable. Many thanks to those who have visited Lina, and to the doctors, nurses etc who have shown how wonderful the NHS is. Bless you Lina. Heaven has a new angel and I feel so privileged to be your husband.

In 1986, Lina went to Hong Kong and worked as a Domestic. She also looked after a baby boy in the same household, before returning to the Philippines in 1987. She came to London, and her sister, Rose, helped to get her a job as a Domestic in the Jordanian Embassy in Victoria. The daughter of the Ambassador was also called Lina, and it was suggested to Lina that the name Amaline would help prevent mix-ups such as when Lina might answer the phone. It was as Amaline that I first knew her. Lina was still Amaline on the day of our wedding. "Collected hair-dressed Amaline from across the road and into David's wedding limousine", as a diary entry for that day records. She was still Amaline on December 28 when she went back to work on a freezing cold day. "Amaline stood up well to her first day back, in red coat and red tartan scarf." Red was her colour!

Having jumped forward in time on the trail of 'Amaline', it's time to return to the Jordanian Embassy era, and my first meeting with Lina. We met at the Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant in Marble Arch. Two people hoping to meet someone to settle down with. A friend of mine's wife, who knew Lina, had suggested that we should get together. A pleasant time was had and we continued to meet in the weeks that followed during the Autumn of 1991. I recall visiting the Jordanian Embassy where I was well received. Lina moved on to the residence of the Ambassador of Saudi Arabia in Notting Hill Gate soon after. Lina continued to work as a Domestic with the kitchen being her main working area. She would invite me to the servants quarters in the residence. I found the guards at the gates very friendly and, after searching me, they would wave my motor bike on as I made for the servants entrance. It's nice to be trusted. I was even allowed to stay the night whenever I called during 1992.

Underneath - From left to right

Maria Lolita (Lina's eldest sister known as Lita) Joy (Lina's niece) Rosalina (known as Lina) Rosalinda (Lina's twin sister known as Rose)

I recall a lovely Christmas in the servants quarters in 1993. Lina was moved to the actual Saudi Arabian Embassy in Charles Street during 1994 which meant she now had nowhere to live. So she moved into Willow Villa which I had purchased in April 1994. This would be her home until she tragically passed away in 2024. Lina commuted from Manor Park to the Embassy in Mayfair and became a very popular member of the Service Staff there. She got on well with the diplomats, serving them tea and coffee, and bringing up their mail. She used to tell me about an elderly man called Costas who became a good friend to her. This was a very happy time in her life. She loved clothes, and working at the Embassy gave her the opportunity to make good use of her ever increasing wardrobe. I would walk Lina to the bus stop before starting my Teaching day.

We were married from Willow Villa on January 21, 1995 at Passmore Edwards Registry Office, on the edge of Plashet Park. Lina was still known as Amaline at both the Embassy and at home but she was Rosalina at Passmore Edwards. I can't recall when she became Lina at home but she continued to be Amaline at the Embassy up until 2020 when she retired. 'Mummy Ruth' was her best lady at the wedding service, and I decided to have two best men, Stan and Greg. Our reception was held at Willow Villa where I had borrowed 40 chairs from Salisbury Primary School. Despite a little bit of rain, it was a very enjoyable occasion. In the summer, we had a belated Honeymoon in Paris. Although we were unable to have children, it was a happy marriage. Technically, I am now a widower since March 14, but in my heart I am still married to my dearest Lina, and will remain so.

We had annual Summer Holidays when we could, visiting Holland, Belgium, France and Spain. Our visit to Spain, in 1996, was my favourite holiday and I think Lina's too. Nerja was particularly beautiful with its beaches and its stunning caves. Our day trip to Granada and The Alhambra was spectacular. It was Lina's first visit to Spain, a country with close links to her native Philippines (named after King Philip ll in the 16th Century) Holidays to the Philippines were of course important too. We also had two very pleasant holidays in Scotland and the Lake District. Visiting my relatives in Yorkshire and in Norfolk was special too. The Yorkshire Moors and the Norfolk Broads being two of England's most popular attractions. Lina greatly enjoyed meeting and staying with my sister Jane's relatives in Norfolk, and they loved meeting a new member of the family. Similarly, I enjoyed meeting Lina's niece Joy and her family on several occasions. They live in North West London. The picture (above right) shows Lina holding her niece, Rebecca, while my sister, Sharon, holds up a teddy. Sharon's other daughter, Holly, was the bridesmaid at Lina's wedding.

Brandon, James, Caitleen, Amadeo

Caitleen and Rosalina

Lorne, Dan and Jane

Ben

The above pictures show Joy's 3 children and her husband Amadeo. Joy is the daughter of Eduardo (Lina's brother) and is in several earlier photos. Jane is pictured with her partner Lorne and her eldest son, Daniel. Her other son, Ben, is pictured next. Two of Ben's 4 sons, Egan and Elios, are with their mother, Malveena, in below centre. Jane's daughter, Kerry, is below right with her brothers Dan and Ben. Kerry's eldest son, Connor, is pictured top right with his sisters, Megan and Grace. Kerry moved to Ireland but Connor has returned to Norfolk. He and wife, Dolly, have two sons, Mason and Markus. Immediately below left are Sharon's daughters, Rebecca (left) and Holly (right) who live in London. Their father, Richard, and Sharon, are pictured below them at Lina's wedding. Dan's daughters, Beth and Lauren are below centre with Dan and his motor bike below. We often visited my step-father Bernard and his wife Ann at their home in Great Horkesley. Lina so enjoyed these visits (middle right) The 3rd row shows bridesmaid Holly, Bernard kissing Lina, Lina and Ben, Lorne and Jane, and finally, Lucette who arranged Lina and my first meeting. Thank you Lucette.

Earlier, we looked at Lina’s ancestry. Now to meet her 5 siblings with information about their lives and their own families. Maria (known as Lita) came to England in 1972 at the age of 26. She worked for a family in St John’s Wood. Then she worked in the kitchen at the Royal Marsden Hospital. She moved on to Motability, first in their office in the Strand, and then in Harlow when they relocated there. Afterwards, Lita worked at John Lewis, Oxford Street, as in the Customer Services Department on the top floor. Her most recent job has been as a Lollipop Lady in Manor Park where she has lived with Lina and myself since 1995. Lina’s twin sister Rose worked in Saudi Arabia and then in Lebanon before coming to London to work in the Jordanian Embassy in Victoria. She eventually returned to the Philippines with her son Sharif. She has lived there ever since with her partner Rudy.

Lina’s 3 brothers have lived in the Philippines all their lives. Orlando had just one child, Grace. Sadly he died in an accident when Grace was young. She has two sons, Jimboy and Jake, and one daughter, Gracelle. Her mother, Evelyn, re-married and Grace has several step-siblings from that marriage. Eduardo has one son, Alfred, who is an engineer and has worked abroad, and one daughter, Joy. She married Amadeo Morta, who works for the Post Office. They have 3 children – Brandon, Caitleen, and James. Apart from Lita, Joy is Lina’s only relative living in England, and has been a tower of strength to Lina during her hospitalization. Caitleen will be a qualified nurse this summer. Eduardo’s wife Ely, passed away a few years ago. Lina’s youngest brother is Fernando. He and his late wife, Tessie, have 3 children – Virginia, Fernando Junior (known as Pindoco) and Joanne. Pindoco is a hairdresser. Joanne has worked abroad.

Tessie, Amadeo, Sharif, Rose Rose and Alfred Lina, Alfred, Joy Fernando

Lita Lita and Caitleen Lita Virginia Lina and Rose

Lita Eduardo Ely Lily (Amadeo's mum) Lina dancing with friend Mac Mac (Lina's fav vlogger) Grace

Joanne,Tessie (back) Fernando & son, Penduco (middle) Tessie & Fernando Lina's mother, Venancia Eduardo & Ely Lim Lim (Lina's relative & chat friend in Messenger)

Rosalina's Astrology

Although Lina and Rose are twins and their birth charts almost identical, various factors can make them different. Different life experiences – relocations – health etc. My analysis here is of Lina’s birth influences and how they might affect her. Astrology can only go so far.

Rosalina was born in the Lunar Year of the Wood Horse under the Western Zodiac sign of Gemini. Sharing a house with myself (Metal Tiger) and her sister Lita (Fire Dog) is astrologically interesting because Horse, Tiger and Dog make up one of the 4 Friendship groups in Lunar Astrology.

Wood likes to spread itself as plants do and to be adventurous. Lina did this in coming to England to work. She also looked forward to our holidays together and meeting my family and friends. Her horse similarly. Her long journeys to work were no problem for her. Lina took them in her stride. Her Gemini was also happy to be among people on trains and buses, and then with her colleagues.

Rosalina's Wood element also has a relationship with my Metal and with Lita's Fire. Although Metal controls Wood, in theory, this control can also be seen as positive because Metal can both shape Wood into an ornament or prune it, as with a tree or a rose bush. Similarly, enlightened parents control their children in a mutually beneficial way.

Rosalina’s Wood and Lita’s Fire are part of the generating cycle which shows the relationship of support between two elements. Wood and Fire naturally nurture each other. Wood feeds fire by keeping it alight, and the sun (fire) helps plants (wood) to grow through its gift of light. Fire people helping Wood people to express themselves and visa versa.

Rosalina’s Gemini and Horse match her Wood’s sense of adventure. Gemini is a people’s person, and Horse likes to be either galloping far and wide as a free spirit or with a human astride. Rosalina loved being with people but she also enjoyed an hour’s walk, alone, to Ilford or East Ham, taking in some window shopping on route. She loved talking with online friends via Messenger and Facebook. In the Eastern Astrology, there is no Gemini. They call it ‘Horse Month.’ Therefore, Rosalina is Horse Year and Horse Month.

Western Astrology shows that Rosalina has Moon in Virgo to go with her Sun in Gemini. The planet Mercury is the common denominator here because it rules both. Gemini never stops communicating which is just what Mercury does as messenger of the gods. Being of service is a Mercury trait, and Lina’s job entailed just that. Her job description was ‘Service Staff’, taking mail as well as drinks to embassy diplomats.

Virgo Moon shows Mercury’s yin side rather than Gemini’s yang one. Virgo is about processing and analysing rather than Gemini's outward expression. Lina liked things to be neat, tidy and orderly and not out of place. She expected the same of others, including their appearance. She would be critical if they weren’t. This included being self-critical! When she cut my hair or finger and toenails, she took a long time! Her work had to be as near to perfection as possible. She believed in straight-talking and honesty rather than just pleasing.

So Lina was as much Moon in Virgo as she was Gemini Sun. This was not easy for her because Gemini and Virgo are so different, being 3 signs apart. Inner conflict sometimes. Her Mercury itself is in Cancer which like Virgo, is a yin energy – very different to her Gemini. Lina’s Venus and Jupiter are also in Cancer giving her home-loving, motherly and nurturing qualities. She excelled in cooking as those with Cancer influences often do. Cancer is the most feelings-orientated sign.

Sadly, Lina never became a mother which affected her very much, given her twin sister Rose did have a child. Lina’s dad died, aged 44, from stab wounds, the day before her 7th birthday. Her mum died, aged 53, from Bronchial Asthma, 3 days before her 12th birthday. She rarely talked to me about these losses. Some feelings are too painful to share.

Lina has Mars Retrograde in her birth chart which suggests her actions might be inconsistent. At times too passive and at other times, too aggressive. This is because Mars wants to be active but retrograde halts its progress. This might frustrate Lina from time to time.

To conclude, Lina’s Gemini (Air) is one of 2 perfect matches for my Leo (Fire) because they are 2 signs apart in the zodiac wheel. The reason being that Air and Fire need each other. Lina’s Horse is one of 3 perfect matches for my Tiger. See earlier.

Rosalina's Hospitalization

Lina left our house, Willow Villa, on Sunday, November 19th, 2023, and we were driven to Newham University Hospital in a 111 ambulance. She would never see her home again. The night before, Lina had begun shaking in the kitchen with her head going up and down. I tried to ring 111 but Lina took the phone from me. Almost as if she knew that if she left for the hospital, she would never return. The following morning, Lina had a recurrence of her problem, and this time, she accepted the situation. Once at the hospital, Lina went through 8 hours of tests and scans, and was given a room in the A and E area. The following day, a doctor came to the room, and with my consent and Lina’s, told Lina that she had cancer of the lungs and brain. After 4 nights in an A and E room, Lina was transferred to Tayberry Ward where there were 4 other patients to keep her company. About a week later, I observed Lina getting dressed. She looked at me and told me to carry on eating my sandwich. Once she had put on her back pack, I got up and motioned to a nurse to come over to our ward. “I think my wife is discharging herself.” Eventually 2 nurses intercepted her together with a doctor and curtained her bed off. Seeing that the occupants of the other beds had each left after a few days, Lina probably felt it was her turn. Bless her.

I kept a diary of Rosalina’s 17 weeks in Hospital and it tells the story of one person's extraordinary bravery and resilience. The more I visited her and observed what she was going through, the more I loved her and marvelled at her positivity. God bless you, my dearest Rosalina.

Lina often stood near the doorway of her room calling out to anyone passing by “Hello”. She was allowed to have the door open but at night, she rarely slept, lying in bed with her door shut for the night. She remained positive throughout, and her visitors often commented on her smiling face and friendly manner. By this time, with parts of her memory affected by the brain surgeries, Lina found it difficult to express herself clearly in English and got particularly frustrated with me and my inability to make out what she was saying. It was a little easier for her to interact with Joy and Lita who were fellow Tagalog speakers. Nevertheless, she did appreciate the regularity of my visits. After a rather special time in 4E, Lina was transferred to a room in 12F which had a wonderful view across Whitechapel. The rooms in the Royal London were particularly spacious. On January 19, a meeting was held to discuss Lina’s future with Jane joining on webcam. Lots of possibilities were discussed. On January 21, I took our Wedding Photographs Album in but Lina felt to sad to view them. Although she was determined to keep on fighting, another side of her rejected all her pre-hospital interests such as the Filipino Vloggers she used to watch on her ipad etc. Hospital life was gradually draining her even though she kept a brave face.

The following morning, Doctor Steele, from St Barts Hospital, came to see me about whether Lina was ready to undergo a chemo-therapy type treatment called Alectrinib. He spoke with Lina in 12F and then spoke to me in another room. He felt she wasn’t quite ready yet but would see me the following week to discuss further. Lina had a fall that day, and again fell the next day, banging her head. Bad luck was a constant feature of her hospitalization. On January 25, Joy informed me that Lina was being transferred to Heather Ward in Newham Hospital, and I quickly gave Sharon the news as she was setting out for Whitechapel. Heather Ward was very nice, and I joked with Lina that we never knew where to find her! In all, Lina was moved 13 times during her 17 weeks but she took it all so well. I admired her more and more. This latest move meant that we lost touch with Doctor Steele. In Heather Ward, Lina was getting good practise at using both her walking frame and a walking stick. Lina’s bad luck continued on the 31st when she cut a toe using her nail clippers, but eventually, a Sri Lankan nurse was able to stop the bleeding. She was the most wonderful person. February arrived with yet another room switch for Lina – Plashet Ward.

Jane visited and interacted so well with Lina. She let helped Line choose a new fan online – to replace the little one that I had bought her but which lacked power. Given how hot her head tended to get, Lina found fans a godsend! Jane also got Lina to talk about home improvements in readiness for her eventual return home. I am indebted to Jane for all her liaisons with hospital staff, particularly Macmillan nurses (Cancer specialists) and also for her daily calls to me and her wonderful advice. Her experience of hospitals and medical knowledge was a crucial part of these 17 weeks. Sharon, too, has been an invaluable asset in so many ways too. I cannot speak highly enough of two amazing sisters who have helped Lina so much during the most difficult period of her life. Huge thanks to those who visited Lina when they could. Sharon’s daughters, Holly and Rebecca, and Joy’s family too, particularly Joy herself and Caitleen. Not so easy for those living a long way from London but thank you to Richard and Daniel too. Every single visit was important to Lina and she showed her appreciation. Lita played her part too. Despite being unwell herself during much of this period, her visits were vital to Lina’s happiness.

Back to the diary now. When I visited Lina on her 2nd day in Plashet, I was surprised to see Lina sitting on her bed with 4 bags next to her. She was to be moved back to Whitechapel. A doctor took me aside and told me that she was concerned about Lina’s Brain Cancer, and that she needed surgery again. We waited for 2 hours and then a very bumpy ambulance journey to Whitechapel ensued. Poor Lina called out in pain several times before we reached the A and E department at the Royal London where she spent the night. The next day was Lita’s birthday. Joy and her family joined us and we sang Happy Birthday to Lita. Lina was now in Room 7 in B Zone. A doctor rang me the next day to inform me that Lina was to have an infected bone in her brain area removed, and a plate would be inserted. At the hospital, 12D Trauma Ward, I was told that Lina was now in theatre. In fact she was in bed waiting her turn and then fell asleep. The next day, Feb 5, I rang 12D Trauma Ward, and was told that Lina had undergone surgery in the early hours. 5 mins later, Recovery Ward phoned me and Lina spoke to me. I met up with Jane (who gave me her old Samsung smart phone) and we went to see Lina. She was bandaged up but in good spirits. Below left is Newham University Hospital. Below central is the Royal London, Whitechapel.

Lina stayed 2 days in Recovery Ward which was a lovely place with 2 particularly nice Filipino nurses. Joy and Caitleen visited too. On Feb 7, Lina was moved to 12E (room 23) So still in a private room because of superbug. 2 therapists put Lina through her paces. Enjoyable visit. Lina happy I’d got her back-pack teddy safe. Sharon visited and I stayed home to have Shy Q box installed. The next day, Feb 9, Lina responsive to me but I noticed she was becoming incontinent now. Felt so sorry for her as I thought how much she’s been through. So brave and resilient. Lina listed some items of clothing she wanted me to bring her. I also brought the fan that Jane had brought her. Lina told me that a nurse had been unkind to her and also told Jane during her visit on Feb 12. Jane told me that she had never seen Lina so poorly and I agreed. This was the 2nd day running that Lina had fasted for surgery which she’d never had. Very worried about Lina with arms looking rather bruised too. Lita and I went together on Wednesday but Lina was in theatre. Not sure if I saw her at all. A doctor rang me at home saying that the washing had gone well. On Feb 15, Sharon and me arrived at 3pm but Lina in theatre. Waited an hour. Lina back and I gave her the valentine cards from yesterday. Also some Rich Tea finger visits.

I noticed the charger was missing. Stolen? I left a note asking someone to find it. It was back the next day. Dr Mackintosh said that Lina would be back to Newham eventually. Holly and Rab popped by on the Saturday. We chatted at length. Lina looking better now and enjoying Holly’s company. Just Lina and me the next day. Nice time. The Picc Line clearly helping her. Sweet Filipino nurse called Rose. Lita came later. Lina keen for me to find a special watch, and nail clippers. I was unsuccessful with both. Lina thought I was throwing some of her clothes away. Feb 22 – Lina frustrated with me, seemed to want me to go. Cried quietly. Then relented and we had a lovely 45 mins. I totally understood her mood swings and so admired her resilience. The next day, Lina was sitting in a tall chair, wearing a white skull helmet! So sweet. It had finally arrived. I walked her about her room the next day using a walking frame, and we had enjoyable 2 hours. Took photo of my dearest Lina in her helmet. Sunday Feb 25 – no visit, football day, plus Lita was visiting. It was just me visiting on Monday. “I have to go home, I need to go home.” Lina repeated this a few times and my heart melted. Poor, poor Lina. I soothed her as best I could. She responded by singing a beautiful song. I loved her so much.

Sharon and I visited the next day. Lina still wanted to go home. She had some stitches removed. Feb 28 was me then lita later. On the 29th, I played Victor Wood and Eddie Pellegrino from my smart phone with Lina singing along. It being St David’s Day on March 1st, I played my YT video of my song for him. I then played some more of my songs. Dr Edward told Lina he’d see her in 2 months time. Suddenly, Lina told me that she was leaving for Newham later that day! I checked – she was. Her 13th change of room/ward. Little did I know that it would be her last. Room 20, in East Ham Ward was very small. I also noticed a strange board as one entered the ward. It seemed to be boasting of its achievements. e.g. 155 days since anyone has fallen here. Only one chair in the room, and door must always be closed. No walking frame, so I took both of Lina’s hands as I took her for a room walk. “I don’t want to kill myself” Lina repeated a few times. She explained it would be wrong to do so. I played Nora Aunor songs. No visit on the Sunday. I took Lina for another room walk on the Monday, this time with a walking frame. A doctor had told Lina that she would be home soon. Sharon visited on Tuesday March 5th. She had become one of Lina’s most consistent visitors and like, Jane had a wonderful way with Lina

March 6 - Lina enjoying the popcorn I brought in and walking with me around the room. Then 2 Physiotherapists asked me to leave the room for half an hour as they were to put Lina through very strenuous exercises. Then a nurse attended to Lina for some time. Some bleeding had taken place during the exercises. Lita arrived soon after. The following day, Jane and Dan popped round and then we headed for the hospital. I left them with Lina – obeying the 2 visitor’s law – and sat in the lobby for 45 mins. When I returned Richard was there, bonding well with Lina. Dom, the Filipino male nurse had popped in too. I had interesting chat outside with Richard about Hospices etc. Sounded just right for Lina if she ever needed a final place before passing. Little did we know what was approaching for poor Lina. The next day, Lina was whisked off for x-rays as I arrived. 30 mins later she was back and told me that she couldn’t walk now. Her pic line prevented me from trying with her. My 3rd visit in a row without interacting with Lina, and my Saturday visit similarly. Lina left for x-rays just as I arrived. Joy and Caitleen also visited. Lina not looking at all well – suddenly rather weak. At some point, Lina’s walking frame was removed. When I suggested that I should therefore help Lina to her room toilet , I was told that I couldn’t. It transpired that she must do it in her pants/nappy. Unbelievable! East Ham Ward Policy. Whoever is responsible for that policy needs a change of vocation - quickly!

Sunday March 10, I got a call from Sasha – a nurse – for me to come to the hospital because Lina was distressed. Soon after my arrival, a female doctor came in and started talking to both me and Lina. Suddenly, she was telling Lina that she only had 4 weeks or less to live! The Cancer had spread to the Liver and Bone Marrow. How Lina was reacting to this was hard to tell because the doctor obscured my view. The doctor told me that it was best to tell Lina straight out. For my part, I was numbed by this news and shocked at how the doctor had gone about matters. Totally unprofessional! I held back my tears and watched the doctor leave as if she had done her duty. I didn’t recall what I said to Lina or what she said to me. Lita told me afterwards that Lina was asleep when she arrived, and that I must have gone. Then a Doctor Francis, accompanied by Sasha, had taken her to his office to give her the same news. When Lina returned, Lina was still asleep. The darkest day of Lina’s hospitalization. Monday, March 11 – a female doctor rang me in the morning to come to the hospital as soon as possible. This time. Lita set off first, and I arrived by midday. I was so relieved that Lina was still alive. Once in the room, where Joy and Lita were attending to lina, I had to turn my back whilst tears were falling. By 1pm, Sharon and Holly arrived, and then Jane. We were joined by Ola, a nurse or doctor, who suggested that some of us took it in turns to spend the night with Lina.

Lita offered to take the first night, and I would take Tuesday night. Lina remained sleeping throughout our visit. After everyone left, Rebecca came in, and Lina was partly awake by then. It was nice to finally meet Rebecca on her third visit. I stayed after she left, and then Lita and Joy arrived for their night duty. I left at 9pm. Tuesday, March 12 – I was at the hospital by 7,45. Lina’d had a bad night – very vocal. She had always told me that she rarely slept at night. Such a beautiful experience, listening to her singing “la la la la ... la” wow! I la la la’d too and sang “If you only knew how much I love you” with la la la and “I love you what more can I say” Lina continued singing and I continued interacting with whatever she sang. She was particularly happy when I gave her lollipop water sponge sticks which helped quench her thirst and freshened her lips. I didn’t want to leave her but did so about 2pm. When I discovered that Lita couldn’t go back to the hospital that day, I decided to head back to Lina after a short rest and food. Therefore I started my night duty at about 5.30! I noticed that Lina’s oxygen piping wasn’t fixed securely, and a passing nurse helped me try to fix it but to no avail. She said that she would tell a nurse who was good at such things. 30 mins later, her friend popped in for 4 secs, and promptly left saying “I’m not needed, it’s fixed.” She didn’t even speak to me. I had been able to temporarily put the piping in Lina’s nostrils but it never stayed there

After two failures to attract anyone’s attention by standing at the door, I sat down, leaving the door wide open. Now THAT did send another nurse in who eventually replaced the piping with a better one. Eventually, my night started in earnest, and what a beautiful experience I had with my beloved Lina. More la la la singing and some tagalog talking. She didn’t call out or make any sort of noise. She loved her water sticks and seemed to appreciate my efforts to interact with her. This included kissing her forehead several times. Her legs were clearly troubling her and she tapped her legs to ease the pain. She even took my hand and made it do the same. I asked her to tell me if she needed me to call a nurse to give her a sedative. Eventually, at about 5 am, I did ring for a nurse, who came and gave her something that put her to sleep. I stayed for another hour and then went home. Lita was ready to go, eventually, I went to bed until 2pm. I got back to the hospital about 5pm and found Lina was now sedated. I could see her right eye open which seemed to be looking at me as if trying to tell me something. For most of the 3 hours, I was mesmerised by it. At 8pm, I said goodbye to Lita who was staying the night. I kissed Lina’s forehead and told her how much I loved her. Even as I left, I had this feeling that I should have stayed. I got to bed at midnight and awoke about 4am. After dressing, the phone went. It was Lita. Lina had died at 2.15 am. God bless you Lina. Rest in Peace in Heaven.

On Dec 5, Lina underwent her first lung biopsy which had to be aborted, and similarly the next day. I missed the next 3 days due to a cold virus – I felt ok to visit but didn’t want to pass it on. Meantime, Lina had been moved to Stratford Ward on Dec 7 and was fitted with a lung drain. I resumed my visits on Dec 9 and met Joy and Caitleen there. Sharon visited on the 12th and she and Lina interacted well. Sharon was to become a regular visitor. Lina rang me from hospital on Dec 16th , urging me to come and take her home! It was one of my rare non-visiting days and I checked with the hospital who said that taking her home was not an option. On the 18th, Lina went to St Bartholomew’s Hospital for an endobronchial ultrasound scan (ebus) which would eventually take samples (biopsies) of the lung and lymph nodes. I was asked to be present for what became Lina’s first serious ordeal. Throughout this and other processes and surgeries during the next few months, I was so impressed by Lina’s bravery and resilience. Her constant phrase “never mind” will stay with me forever. She returned to Stratford Ward that night but on Dec 21, she went to the Royal London Hospital, Whitechapel for her first brain surgery – to remove a tumour. I received a call to say it had gone well.

Lina stayed in Ward 12E over Christmas, and Joy and her family joined Lita and I with Lina on Christmas Day. The next day, I received a call from the hospital that Lina was to go to theatre to stop bleeding from her brain. I rushed to 12 E and was told that she was still in theatre. Eventually, she was released to Recovery and then on to Intensive Care Ward. I wasn’t able to see her until the following day. Dec 27 is a day I will never forget. I entered room 30 in 4E (Intensive Care) and saw Lina’s head bandaged with just her eyes visible. After wiping away my tears, I looked at her and spoke softly to her. She was unable to speak but the one eye of hers that I could see focused on mine. I caressed her hand and she mine. We did this for 90 mins. My dearest Rosalina was still alive. Her life had been saved. Jane and Lita visited her the next day, and Sharon on the 29th. My daily visits meant so much to me, culminating on New Years Eve, when at 4pm London Time, we wished in the Filipino New Year. Kathryn (also Filipino) showed the celebrations to us on her PC. In 4E, there is a nurse in each room for 24 hours. Lina stayed in 4E well into January until she was moved into a room in 12F. She had contacted a Superbug infection whilst in 4E and would never be in a ward again. This would, ultimately, lead to isolation and loneliness not being in a ward with fellow patients.. An example of the sort of bad luck that would hinder poor Lina throughout her time in hospital. Her response? "Never Mind".

The door to Lina's room in East Ham Ward. Lina Lina wearing her protective helmet Lina

Lina on her way to Heaven Lina's mother, Venancia.

Below is a lovely tribute to Rosalina which her best friend and relative, Dennis, sent to me to read out at Rosalina's cremation service. Below that is a beautiful tribute which Rosalina's sister, Lita, read out at the end of the service. It was a very moving and fitting celebration of Lina's life with everyone wearing a silk white rose and laying a real white rose on Lina's coffin. Afterwards everyone went to the Blakesley Arms where a buffet was laid on. The reason for the white roses was because Lina had told Dennis, about a year ago, that if she died, she would like to be remembered by a white rose. This was long before her hospitalization and fight against cancer.

Gathering together before going into the Chapel to Nora Aunor's recording of Dahil Sa Iyo (Because of you) in Tagalog. Then people went up to share memories of Rosalina. The daffodil screen below became a slide show of 25 photos of Lina, running throughout the 45 mins celebration. We left to a recording of 'Portrait of My Love' by Matt Monroe.

The first 2 songs were featured at Lina's Cremation Service. The 3rd song, "If You Only Knew", I sang to Lina's la la la's during the last few days of her life. An extraordinary experience

Rosalina Talking, Dancing and Singing in 2019 in both the Philippines and London

If any of the videos dont show or say not available, refresh the page. Failing that click above the arrow on the videos that do show, and it will take you to that video at You Tube. There, all 6 videos will play. zzenzero has them in his channel. If you click on the arrow, the video will play on this page only.

Lina and Rose celebrating their 65th birthday Lin Lin's son and Lina celebrating shared June 7 bday Lina dancing with Lin Lin and others

Lina talking to Millie Lina and her brother Fernando on Messenger Pt 1 Lina and Fernando on Messenger Pt 2

Rosalina, Lita (holding Morning Grace) Chris 1995 The next three videos are Rosalina and me dueting at our home at Willow Villa, London 1995

MISCELLANEOUS

Rosalina

Left Willow Villa, never to return

Thirty years of mem’ries, lessons to learn

Eight hours of scanning, leaving her drained

Cancer of the lung and Cancer of the brain

Never mind she said, never mind she smiled

I’ll do my best, and fight all the while.

With God on my side, and Mother Mary too

Accept what I must, and try to pull through

Oh Rosalina, your battle’s begun

Oh Rosalina, my dearest one

Her first week in Tayberry, was pleasant enough

Fellow patients around her, nothing too tough

But suddenly she noticed, their stay was so brief,

Yet she was still there, after more than a week

So she got herself dressed, and put on her back pack

Told me not to mind her, carry on with my snack

But before she got far, two nurses appeared

Persuading her to stay, your place is still here

Oh Rosalina, your battle’s begun

Oh Rosalina, my dearest one

The lung biopsy / was so hard to take

So to Stratford Ward, and a lung drain

On to St Barts and an ebus explored

Good fortune at last and back to Stratford

Now the brain tumour, and another hospital

The Royal London, Whitechapel, her next port of call

Christmas at 12 E and temporary success

But her brain started bleeding –she was close to death

Oh Rosalina, your battle’s begun

Oh Rosalina, my dearest one

Boxing Day Surgery – it saved her life

And I still had – my lovely wife

Now in 4E – our hands were entwined

For an hour and a half – it was sublime

Her eyes looked at me but never a sound

Our hands did the speaking, peace all around

Such a beautiful place, living up to its name

The Intensive Care Unit, so glad we came

Oh Rosalina, your battle’s begun

Oh Rosalina, my dearest one

We saw in the New Year, and a few weeks more

Could have stayed there forever, but 12F now called

Sadly for Lina, MRSA had struck,

Superbug infection, just her bad luck

Never again, could she be in a ward

Loneliness beckoned, like a piercing sword

Courageous, resilient, she did her best

To face every challenge, and every test

Oh Rosalina, your battle’s begun

Oh Rosalina, my dearest one

No sooner had she settled, she’d be whisked off again

Never mind she kept saying, whatever the pain

Pain in her body, pain in her heart

Wondering if ever, chemo would start

13 switches in seventeen weeks

But never a switch to the place she most needs

“I have to go home” you would hear her beseech

But Willow Villa, remained out of reach

Oh Rosalina, your battle’s begun

Oh Rosalina, my dearest one

Finally, it happened, a doctor revealed

She’d die very soon, her fate it was sealed

Cancer of the liver, cancer of the bone

Were added to the Cancers - already known

Poor Rosalina, now gave up the fight

Shattered, bewildered, no more light

Hallucinations now, two dreadful nights

They calmed her with morphine, and all was quiet

Oh Rosalina, your battle’s nearly done

Oh Rosalina, my dearest one

But her penultimate night, saw a wondrous swan song

She sang her heart out – her spirit still strong

It was my turn on duty, and we bonded uniquely

Tagalog and la la’s, all sung so sweetly

With Dawn fast approaching, I decided it wise

For Lina to sleep, and she closed her eyes.

Twenty hours later, she was still asleep

She’d passed on to Heaven, finally at peace

Oh Rosalina, your battle is done

Oh Rosalina, my dearest one

Oh Rosalina, I love you so much

Oh Rosalina, that tender touch

The following song tells the story of Rosalina's journey from her home on November 19 to her passing on March 14 in Newham Hospital. She was moved 13 times between Newham and the Royal London Hospital, Whitechapel. Her bravery and resilience was astonishing.

She lay there alone, night after night

Hardly_sleeping at all, such was her plight

So_much on her mind, frustrating her so

No idea of her future, she just didn’t know

No-one to talk to, other than staff

Feeling so lonely, breaking her heart

Longing for company, longing for a hug

Confined to her room, that Superbug

Her spirit was lifted, when visitors came,

Her eyes lit up, she forgot her pain

Though her memory loss, restricted her speech

She tried so hard_to_interact with each

When they were gone, it was back to routine

Eating and sleeping, no in between

She’d rejected all things, that she used to do

Not even the vloggers, could pull her through

“I have to go home” she often said

But all she got was her hospital bed

More tests to be done, and surgery too

Endless needles, till she’s black and blue

Meetings were held, to discuss her future

Plans drawn up -- to see what would suit her

Constant_changes of rooms, and hospitals

Each_having their own - set of rules

Yet the doctors were doing the best that they could

Likewise the nurses, caring and good

And she valued their efforts, with a smile and thank you

Whilst wondering if ever, there’d be a breakthrough

But nothing conclusive, just more and more tests

And more lonely nights, she was so depressed

After sixteen long weeks, she was finally told,

That her time on earth, was coming to a close

No return home but an oxygen pipe

Saw her last few days, end in dark night

A beautiful soul had drawn her last breath

So much yet to give, but a premature death

The wedding of Lina's twin sister Rose & Rudi on June 7, 1990. Rose's son Sharif was born in London in 1990.

Lina's favourite actor is Tom Cruise. We often went to the cinema to watch his films.

Lonely

After visiting several of my relatives' Facebook pages, I thought it would be nice to share some of their pictures.

Smile and the World smiles with you

Markus with his grandfather, Andy Mason and his dad, Connor Dan with his daughters, Beth and Lauren Beth and Mason

Laura and Dan Ben and Mal Dolly and Connor Lorne and Jane

Mal and Ben Markus, Connor, and Mason Chris and Lina Lina

Videos of the 3 songs written about Rosalina. Scroll up for the lyrics of 'Rosalina' and of 'Loneliness'. Scroll down for 'One White Rose'. You can watch them at You Tube (fullscreen) by clicking above the arrow on the thumbnail or just watch them here. If you get 'video not available', refresh page. All these videos ARE available

One White Rose

When I die, please mark my grave

With one white rose

When I die, remember me

With one white rose

Then I’ll be happy and rest in peace

No more worries, finally at ease

I’ve tried so hard, to put things right

To make amends and be contrite

When I die, please mark my grave

With one white rose (etc)

No matter what, I must be kind

My new expression, is “never mind”

Some call me Happy, a name I love well

Dennis’ children just make me feel swell

When I die, please mark my grave

With one white rose (etc)

My little sister is my legacy

Built with my earnings from the embassy

Can’t often be there, she’s so far away

But others may share her, and enjoy their stay

When I die, please mark my grave (etc)

The Abbey Centre, a breath of fresh air

Making new friends, so much to share

Optimism it fills my heart

I’m really making, a brand new start

When I die, please mark my grave (etc)

One White Rose Rosalina Loneliness

4 photos of Lina's house 'Little Sister'

Virginia, Fernando, Enduco, Joanne, Tessie

Grace